Relegated

What's the frequency Geoffeth?  After spending the better of the last two months off of my bike, I am back.  My knee is about sixty percent at best, but thanks to my physical therapy and some new pedals, I am able to ride.  For now that will have to be good enough because, for awhile, I wasn't sure it was going to get better.

I had an idea of what not riding would mean for this year.  At first I was resigned to deal with it and overcome, but the longer I went, the worse I felt about it.  I could barely make it up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing and my leg hurting like hell; how was I going to race my bike and not totally embarrass myself? Until now, I have had plenty of things to occupy my mind and my time, but now I just stress.  What am I stressing about?  I'm a CAT 4 for chrissake and a professional one at that. My career cycling aspirations involve maybe making it to be a CAT 3.  Why am I letting my outlet become my biggest stress?

I worry.  That is what I do.  I felt so good about my riding last year and was so focussed on being better this year, that I let it dominate my thoughts.  No more.  I'm just going to ride and see what happens.  If that is defeatist, then so be it, at least I will be on my bike.  This year I am riding for fun.